Just a few more days to go until our crazy fundraising event Be INVNCBL! 4 sleeps exactly in fact. I went to a training session tonight in the hopes that a really last-minute burst of activity will get me through it.
I think I may end up requiring an oxygen tank on Saturday around 12.40pm! I am assured though, that the others (except for Gary) are feeling just as nervous as I am and that no – one has done as much training as they would have liked. We shall see!
What keeps going through my mind and I think the thing that will keep me going on Saturday, without too much complaining, is the fact that the 5 friends of Gumby’s who were with him on his last night, are going through and have been through, a more horrendously awful time than I could ever imagine.
Granted, my mom and I are struggling and each person’s experience of losing and missing Gumby is unique but, for these boys, it’s a totally different experience.
We have lost a part of our hearts that can never be replaced. Our memory of him has the possibility of being tainted with images we can only imagine. The friends who were with Gumby saw it for real.
The way Jeremy died was brutal. Those people (if they can be called that) who did it, showed no mercy to him. From what I can understand, each of the friends there that night was fearful for their lives.
Traumatic experiences like that don’t just get forgotten. I don’t believe it is something that anybody could ever ‘get over’ and as if that’s not enough, they have the added pressure of having to go to court to testify and try to ensure that ‘justice’ is done. That the barbarians that did this to our wonderful Gumby, don’t get the opportunity to ruin more lives.
Initially, a trial date was set for December 2014. This was postponed until today – 14 April 2015. Unfortunately, not everything was ready so it has been postponed yet again. Theoretically, until next week.
As if living with the memory of what happened is not horrific enough, how much more traumatic to have to re-live it again and again just to be told that the ‘system’ is not ready.
That the ‘justice’ system allows this to happen is unbelievable. I don’t know enough about the way things happen with regards to court cases in South Africa, or indeed any country, to pass much comment but I do know that it is not helpful and I strongly believe it could be quite harmful in fact, for it to be dealt with in a slow and incompetent manner.
For myself, if I was sure that there would in fact be a trial happening on the date we were given, I would perhaps be doing things differently. I wish so much that I could be there to give the boys who did their best to save my beautiful brother, hugs and all the support I possibly could.
To be there for my brother.
So yes, I know I will hurt on Saturday. A lot. But I will hurt with a smile on my face because as much as I wish there was a happier reason to be raising money, I know that what we are doing is good. And trying to do good has got to be better than doing nothing, right?
Your love and support keeps us going.