Oh boy.
I better warn you – this may be a tear-jerker.
A good friend asked me the other day how I am doing. He & his family have had their share of deep, close, ‘should never happen’ loss & they also knew my dad & brother well so it helps to talk to him.
Although I know that everyone understands that it must be difficult for us & that they can try to imagine what it must be like. The truth is, until you’ve lost someone yourself, thankfully you don’t have any real idea (long may that last for you xxx).
Even those of us who have lost someone can’t ever know how someone else is feeling although I believe that the finality of never being able to see or hug them again feels as brutal for us all.
Weirdly enough, the last few weeks I’ve been feeling like losing my dad & brother has only just happened. It feels as raw, painful & totally overwhelming today, as it has for the last almost 2 years.
Sometimes it feels like it’s getting harder rather than easier. Apparently this is normal.
It might have something to do with the fact that on Monday (7th December) it will be 2 years since dad died.
Or it could just be because that’s the way grief goes.
Out of the blue someone sent this to me the other day suggesting it might help me to understand grief a bit more as it did for her.
It so closely resembled the chat I had earlier in the week & explains beautifully how grief does indeed seem like waves crashing & smashing things to pieces.
I hope it helps you too.
(Here’s the link to the original article.)
Lots of love xx
I agree with the older gentleman. My Mom died 36 years ago at the age of 50, my Dad 4years later. Five years ago I lost my older brother, best friend and Nana within 4 months. The shipwrecks keep coming. The waves are brutal, but God is my anchor. I hope He is yours
Wow Myra. That’s a lot of grief 🙁 so much love and strength. Glad you have some comfort in God xx
This is beautiful. My mom just passed away in December and it has been the most difficult thing I have gone through. What this “old man” says is exactly how I feel. The waves have slowed down but when they come they are still enormous and I am back to December 19th again. What he said is exactly how I feel. Thanks for sharing
Hi Lesa, so sorry about your mom. I’m glad you found this – I too found it so accurate with describing how grief feels and found it helpful to understand and cope with the sudden and regular overwhelming feelings. Take care xxx